4 weeks and a scare

Well yesterday Kennedy was 4 weeks old and she gave us a bit of a scare. Around 11am we were packing stuff up and getting ready to head down to the hospital when the phone rang. Shawn answered. I could tell it was someone from the hospital. As the phone call went on- longer then the usual call confirming an appointment or asking how we are doing- I watched him. All he was saying was a lot of "uh has" and "oks". I watched his face trying to figure out who he was talking with and if everything was ok. I could tell this was one of those phone calls I had been dreading. When he hung up the phone I tried to hold back tears knowing that something wasn't right. He told me everything was ok, but he wanted me to sit down. I started sobbing. The day before her saturation levels were low so yesterday morning they decided to replace her E.T. tube (breathing tube) with a larger one. This is something normal that happens between the weights of 1100 and 1300 grams. While they were trying to place the new tube she clamped down and they couldn't get it in place right away. During all this her heart rate dropped into the mid 80's (usually around 150) and they had to do chest compressions. They stabilised her and they gave her morphine to help relax her and so she could rest. He told me all of this, but I didn't hear it, or maybe I just didn't want to hear it, but he would end up going over it with me three or four times before I could take it all in at the end of the day. We immediately got in the car and Shawn drove us down to the hospital faster than I had ever seen anyone drive in my life. The whole time I was crying, but trying to calm myself down- even though she was ok I just couldn't take it all in.

We got to the hospital and stayed with her for a few hours, but after I saw she was ok the physical exhaustion from the scare set in and I was just so tired I could barely keep my eyes open. Yesterday was supposed to be the first time that Shawn was going to hold Kennedy, but we all thought it best not to attempt it. She had been through so much and needed to rest. Her saturation levels were stable while we were there and when I called later that night they had remained stable. This morning when I called her primary nurse was back on duty which makes Shawn and I both feel so much better. Kennedy's oxygen levels were a little high, but her saturation remained stable and she was doing well. She is off feedings for the moment, but they hope to start her back soon. Her weight is up to 1345 grams which is right about 2 pounds 15 ounces- more than double her birth weight and 13.25 inches long. :0)

Today I am waiting to hear from the Ronald McDonald House to see if they have a room available for us. It is right across the street from the hospital and it would make it possible for me to spend most of my day and night at the hospital with Kennedy. When I spoke to them this morning they said that there was a waiting list and that they have to wait for people to check out and they families are chosen by distance from the hospital and diagnosis. Form the way it sounded I wont be going there today and possibly not for a while, but I am glad I am at least in line for a room since it it likely that Kennedy will be in the hospital at least till the end of July.

Hopefully today Shawn will be able to hold Kennedy and we can get some new pictures up.