Home again and up on a soap box!

So after 70 days in the Ronald McDonald House I came home this past Tuesday. Being down there by myself had gotten to be too stressful. Now I am back at my house and driving daily to be with Kennedy. I am hoping it will give me a few hours of mental down time each day. I loved being so close to her, but at the same time when the hospital is literally 2 minutes away you can never seem to just let your mind relax. I have seen the doctor and I am also trying to find some version of mother's little helper that will take me through this with my sanity still intact.
Yesterday Jenn had some wedding stuff to do in the area so she took me down the hill. While we were having lunch she told me about a person on the baby center board that her sister visits who pretended to have a preemie so that she could collect donations and keep the money. She even stole pictures of other peoples preemies and posted them as her own. I cannot express how disgusted I was to hear this. I wish I could have five minutes alone with that person. No one- and I mean NO ONE other than another micro preemie mom can even begin to imagine what we go through on a daily basis. I have respect for every parent in the NICU and I am sure their time there is the most trying time of their lives, but don't even try to tell me you know how difficult and hard it is to do this because your kid was in the NICU for a week, or two or even a month. They have no idea. 15 weeks- 105 days- that's close to 1/3 of a year. That's how long my child has been away from me. That's how long I have wished every night for her to be home, have prayed that she will be ok for just one more day, that I have spent between 3 and 10 (but most often 6) hours a day in the hospital watching my daughter hooked up to monitors. I don't sleep at night unless I'm medicated. Most of the moms on my mircro preemie board are on some type of anxiety or anti-depression medication, most have had some counseling and and some have been diagnosed with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. I don't mind admitting my weaknesses. I think it makes you a stronger person to be able to do so and I don't say it so people can pity me. The last thing I want or need right now is pity. I say it because I want that person to know or anyone else who might even consider doing something like that to know what kind of situation they are taking advantage of. I suppose there have to be all types in the world to make it work, but I have faith that Karma will take care of this person.

Ok Im stepping off my soapbox now.